One Month Down

Today marks a month that Phil has been gone.

It hasn’t been a great day. 

Phil and I talked this morning via Facebook chat.  He had a pretty bad day and wasn’t feeling well, so he didn’t feel like talking on the phone.  I understand.  I’m just glad I got to talk to him.  I just wish I could make things better for him.  The last couple of days have been pretty bad there, plus he hasn’t been feeling well.  I just wish I could hug him and tell him everything is going to be ok.  It breaks my heart for him, and I’m glad he feels like he can talk to me about anything. Today, Phil told me that he’ll love me forever.  J It made me happy.  I’ll love him forever too.  I hope he’ll be my husband one day.  He’s everything I ever prayed for, and I thank God every day that he’s my boyfriend.  I hope Phil knows that.  I tell him all the time, but I don’t know if he really believes me.

 It was a good conversation, even though it made me worried and sad.

 The rest of the day, was ok.  I went to my Federal Income Tax class after I talked to him.  It was really boring, and I had a hard time concentrating.  After class, I just went home, ate lunch and did laundry.   A little while later, I started feeling really anxious, so I went to the gym.  It’s virtually impossible to feel anxious after running a couple miles.  I like going to the gym at my school too because, not only does it get me out of my apartment, but I also usually see some of my friends at the gym. It helps me get my mind off of my worries for a little bit.  The anxiety is usually the worst at night, so going to the gym in the evening really helps me.  I hope my legs aren’t too sore to go back tomorrow.  I ran two miles tonight.  J

One month down, 8 months to go!  We WILL get through this!